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Two Eyed Poco Cowboy - Shedding out his foal coat and he looks like he's been in a fight! LOL! Twoeyed Poco Cowboy - Aug1-2010 - All shedded out now.

 

A cowboy appeared before St. Peter at the Pearly Gates. "Have you ever done anything of particular merit?" St. Peter asked.
 
"Well, I can think of one thing," the cowboy offered. "On a trip to the Black Hills out in South Dakota, I came upon a gang of bikers, who were threatening a
young woman.  I directed them to leave her alone, but they wouldn't listen."

"So", he continued, "I approached the largest and most
heavily tattooed biker and smacked him in his face, kicked his bike over, ripped out his nose ring, and threw it on the ground." I yelled, "Now, back off!!  Or I'll kick the sh*t out of all of you!"

St. Peter was impressed, "When did this happen?"

"Just a couple of minutes ago..."

A young cowboy walks into a seedy cafe in Western Oklahoma. He sits  at the counter and notices an old cowboy with his arms folded staring blankly at a full bowl of chili.

After fifteen minutes of just sitting there staring at it, the
young cowboy bravely asks the old cowpoke, "If you ain't gonna eat that, mind if I do?"

The older cowboy slowly turns his head toward the young wrangler and in his best Okie manner says, "Nah, go ahead."

Eagerly, the young cowboy reaches over and slides the bowl over to his place and starts spooning it in with delight. He gets nearly down to the bottom and notices a dead mouse in
the chili. The sight was shocking and he immediately barfs up the chili into the bowl. 

The old cowboy quietly says, "Yep, that's as far as I got, too".


On the first day, God created the Horse...

On the second day, God created Man to serve the Horse. On the third day, God created all of the animals of the earth to spook the Horse while Man was upon his back. On the fourth day, God created honest work so that Man could labor to pay for the upkeep of Horse. On the fifth day, God created the grasses in the field so that Horse could eat and Man could do an honest days toil to clean up after Horse. On the sixth day, God created veterinary science to keep Horse healthy and Man broke. On the seventh day, God rested and said “This is good. This will keep Man humble, it will tire him out and keep him striving forward to meet the needs of Horse.”

 

 

 

 horse-alcoholics anonymous

You may be sitting there thinking that you are OK, and don't really need any help. It is not easy to realize that you are a horse-aholic, and even harder to bring yourself to a HA meeting for help. HA is there to assist you. We have some questions to ask to try to determine if you can be helped.

  • Can you say 'sheath' in public without blushing?

  • Do you know exactly what 'snaffle' means? (No, it is not a drink!)

  • Do you drive a truck with some type of towing package and/or dual rear wheel when everyone else you know drives a real car?

  • Do you have more than one type of trailer because you own horses?

  • Do you spend your holidays going to shows, sales, clinics, and seminars when everyone else goes on cruises?

  • Do you discuss things at the dinner table that would make a doctor leave in disgust?

  • Do you consider formal wear clean jeans and freshly scraped boots?

  • Does the inside of your home look like your interior decorator is 'State Line Tack'?

  • Do you often have barn boots on your front porch?

  • Is your mail made up primarily of breed magazines and horse catalogues?

  • Do your shirt pockets often contain bits of feed, hay, and empty syringe covers?

  • Do you worry about paying your monthly feed bill before you think of paying your electric bill?

  • When you meet a person, do you ask how many horses they have, and pity them if the answer is none?

  • Do you remember the name of a great-great-great grand sire when you can't remember your own Great grandfather's name?

  • Is your primary dream in life to breed the perfect foal?

  • Do you find non-horse people boring?

  • Is 99% of your e-mail about horses?

  • Do you have a collection of bits even larger than your collection of horses?

  • Does you halter collection include more than four foal halters, all the same size?

  • Do you know more than five people this list fits exactly?

If you answered YES to three of these questions, you are in pretty good shape. You will lead a long, dull life, and never call your mother and tell her "I'm in the hospital, but everything is fine! The horse is OK."

If you answered YES to 10, you are in serious trouble. Give in gracefully, and become a member of Horse-Alcoholics Anonymous now... You will qualify eventually anyway.

If you answered YES to 15 or more, you are incurable.

Our advice to those who, like us, are incurable is as follows.....

Sit back, smile, read your magazines, newsletters and emails, and know that your life will always be filled with good friends and better horses, and it will never be dull.

Manure...The True Story
 
In the 16th and 17th centuries, everything had to be transported by ship and it was also before commercial   fertilizer's invention, so large shipments of manure were common, at that time it was called a load of Berrier,
by the sailors.

It was shipped dry, because in dry form it weighed a lot less than when wet, but once water (at sea) hit it, it not only became heavier, but the process of fermentation began again, of which a by product is methane gas. As the stuff was stored below decks in bundles you can see what could (and did) happen.

Methane began to build up below decks and the first time someone came below at night with a lantern, BOOOOM!
Several ships were destroyed in this manner before it was determined just what was happening

After that, the bundles of manure were always stamped with the term "Ship High In Transit" on them, which meant for the sailors to stow it high enough off the lower decks so that any water that came into the hold would not touch this volatile cargo and start the production of methane.

Thus evolved the term "S.H.I.T " , (Ship High In Transport) which  has come down through the centuries and is in use to this very day.
 
 You probably did not know the true history of this word.
 
 Neither did I.

I had always thought it was a golf term!   

There was a preacher who was trying to sell his horse. A man stopped by to see how the horse rode. The preacher told the man that instead of saying, “walk", say, “Praise the Lord,” and instead of saying, “Whoa,” say, “Amen.” So the man got on the horse and said, “Praise the Lord,” and the horse started to walk. The man then said, “Praise the Lord,” again and the horse started to trot. He said it a few more times, then the horse started galloping. Suddenly a cliff appeared. The man yelled "Whoa!". The horse didn't stop. He tried yelling all sorts of things, and he tried to pull the horse up, but it wouldn't stop. Then suddenly he remembered what to say. The man said, “Amen.” The horse stopped right before they fell off. The man was so relieved that he put his hand on his forehead and then said, ”Praise the Lord.”


This mare just foaled ... in the 'peanut gallery' can you pick out which horse is the only MALE???

A new variety of Quarter Horse on the Internet???

Hmmm....

Not much room for a saddle...

But it might make a great cart horse .... save on harness!

Food bill would be cut in half! And grooming would be quick.

Trimming and shoeing ....might be a problem!

Turning on the forehand would be obsolete.

Winning by a couple lengths - would be a close race!

                                                                Save on fly masks - their tails  would reach and then some....

An Alberta cowboy was overseeing his herd in a remote mountainous pasture when suddenly a brand-new BMW advanced out of a dust cloud towards him. The driver, a young man in a Brioni suit, Gucci shoes, Ray Ban sunglasses and YSL tie, leans out the window and asks the cowboy, “If I tell you exactly how many cows and calves you have in your herd, will you give me a calf?”

The cowboy looks at the man, obviously a yuppie, then looks at his peacefully grazing herd and calmly answers, “Sure, why not?” The yuppie parks his car, whips out his Dell notebook computer, connects it to his Cingular RAZR V3 cell phone, and surfs to a NASA page on the Internet, where he calls up a GPS satellite navigation system to get an exact fix on his location which he then feeds to another NASA satellite that scans the area in an ultra-high-resolution photo.

He then opens the digital photo in Adobe Photoshop and exports it to an image processing facility in Hamburg, Germany. Within seconds, he receives an email on his Palm Pilot that the image has been processed and the data stored. He then accesses a MS-SQL database through an ODBC connected Excel Spreadsheet with email on his Blackberry and, after a few minutes, receives a response. Finally, he prints out a full-color, 150-page report on his hi-tech, miniaturized HP LaserJet printer and finally turns to the cowboy and says, “You have exactly 1,586 cows and calves.”

“That’s right” says the cowboy. He then watches as the young man selects one of the animals and looks on amused as the young man stuffs it into the trunk of his car.

Then the cowboy says to the young man, “Hey, if I can tell you exactly what your business is, will you give me back my calf?”

The young man thinks about it for a second and then says, “Okay, why not?”

“You’re a member of parliament for the Canadian Government”, says the cowboy.

“Wow! That’s correct,” says the yuppie, “that was quite a guess!”

“No guessing required.” answered the cowboy. “You showed up here even though nobody called you; you want to get paid for an answer I already knew, to a question I never asked. You tried to show me how much smarter than me you are; and you don’t know a thing about cows… this is a herd of sheep.

Now give me back my dog!”

 

Awesome blue eye... can you tell he's ready for a nap???

 

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